If She Became a Flavor You Can Bet it Would Be Sour

December 12, 2007 § 6 Comments

So it seems we needed some time apart, but I’m back now. Winter’s icy fingers are trying to weasel through our drafty windows this very second, but Richard’s sister gave us an early Christmas present— like a tiny, circular, portable tanning bed. It shoots its heat rays very accurately, and while I appreciate the thaw, it makes me wonder if this is the same technology used on those horrifying new DoD ray guns. Admittedly, a much gentler ray gun, but still enough to make me hesitate if one was pointed at me during one of those rare instances when I join the booing congregation outside Province House.

(Ha ha! Ignore that, provincial officials! Stupid joke! We’ll drop off our grant applications tomorrow afternoon.)

It’s not as though we’re bowled over with holiday invitations this year, but I managed to become cranky with all of my commitments anyway. What, I must wrap these gifts and ship them if they’re going to arrive on time? I have to clean out the trunk and select a Christmas Tree? And decorate it? And I only get Christmas cookies if I make them? Humbug!

I’d like to buy him a raincoat and galoshes, an Aeron Miller office chair, a greenhouse full of heirloom tomatoes, three pounds of Sumatra Abongabong, ten days in Garda, supple cowboy boots, a juniper wreath, Adirondack chairs, a cozy fireplace.

What he’ll get instead is a bag of licorice babies and a bottle of Value Size shampoo. Next year, maybe.

But as an Advent gift to you, friends, here’s a recipe for coconut bread that I conveniently and cleverly saved on Richard’s computer instead of my own. It’s from bills, but I’ve converted it to Imperial measurements for myself and my countrymen.

Coconut Bread

Ingredients
2 ½ cups all-purpose flour
2 teaspoons baking powder
2 teaspoons cinnamon
1 cup caster sugar
¾+ cup shredded coconut
2 eggs
1 ¼ cup milk
1 teaspoon vanilla
5 tablespoons unsalted butter, melted

Method
Preheat the oven to 350°. Grease and flour a loaf pan (the recipe calls for 8×4 inches, but I find loaf pans come in so many weird sizes there’s no point being picky; use what you’ve got, and keep an eye on it).

Sift together flour, baking powder and cinnamon, then add sugar and coconut. Stir until well combined. In a separate bowl, whisk eggs, milk and vanilla.

Add egg mixture to flour mixture, stirring until just combined, then swirl through the melted butter, stirring gently until no puddles of butter remain. Pour into your greased loaf pan, and bake for about an hour (depending on the size of your pan, I might start to check after 45 minutes, but in my oven, which runs hot, this bread takes about and hour and fifteen minutes).

Let cool in pan for seven minutes or so, then turn it out onto a wire rack. Serve in thick slices with salt-fish relish (as bill does) or plain with a cup of cocoa (as I do).

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§ 6 Responses to If She Became a Flavor You Can Bet it Would Be Sour

  • I’d like to buy him a raincoat and galoshes, an Aeron Miller office chair, a greenhouse full of heirloom tomatoes, three pounds of Sumatra Abongabong, ten days in Garda, supple cowboy boots, a juniper wreath, Adirondack chairs, a cozy fireplace.

    Goodness! All I want for Christmas is a bottle of Chateau Margaux. I’d go hatless in the rain, sit on a stool, put ketchup on my fries, google to see what the hell “Sumatra Abongabong” means, and forgive all the rest.

  • kristina says:

    Your plan sounds good, too, Stephen, I must admit.

  • Moira says:

    Do you think this cake mixture will work divided into muffin tins. I have just bought some new tins and love trying out new recipes.

    Moira

  • kristina says:

    Hi Moira,

    It’s good to see you back. I remembered that Cook’s Illustrated answered that question not so long ago, and came up with a general formula for transforming quickbreads into muffins. And! I found it! In the first magazine I looked! On the second page!

    The general rule is to cut baking time in half*, then add “a few minutes”, checking on occasion to prevent burning. Then just cool in the pan for 5-10 minutes before turning them out.

    *I made the bread again today for Richard’s osteopath, and it took an hour and eleven minutes, with a temperature higher than 350°F. It was 350° when I put them in, but 40 minutes later it had sneaked up to 410°.

    Oh, oven, why can’t you overheat at a predictable rate?

  • Tena says:

    Hi Kristina,

    Wishing you a merry Christmas!

  • Merry Christmas from me, too! Hope the food and wine are good.

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